You work out of a Hotel?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
