I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
