we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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