i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
