We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
