how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
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