i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
