for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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