I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
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All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home