i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
