Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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