His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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