hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
