So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
