batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
