Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
