i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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