I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize