oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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