Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Randomize
