so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
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i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
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I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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