Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
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