I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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