yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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