He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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