It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
