You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
