would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize