To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
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What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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