I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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