I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
