the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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