In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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