Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
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