She's JV to your varsity
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
