It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
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I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
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If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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