i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
