we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
