I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
