Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
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