He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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