3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Who did Billy Mays play for?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
