How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
