my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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