Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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