Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Randomize
