I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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