Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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