marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
