I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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