I'd wear matching sweaters with you
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Watching her eat just hurts me
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
